


Pass

by prouvaireafterdark



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Gen, Humor, Immortal Husbands Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova, Languages, M/M, POV Nile Freeman
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:54:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25940002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prouvaireafterdark/pseuds/prouvaireafterdark
Summary: The thing they don’t tell you about joining an army of immortal guns for hire is how many fucking languages they expect you to learn.***Andy suggests starting with Italian, but there are some things Nile never wants to understand, and whatever Joe just said to make Nicky turn that shade of pink is absolutely one of them.
Relationships: Andy | Andromache of Scythia & Nile Freeman, Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Comments: 71
Kudos: 818





	Pass

**Author's Note:**

> So this post I made about Nile not wanting to learn Italian kind of blew up so I wrote a ficlet about it

The thing they don’t tell you about joining an army of immortal guns for hire is how many fucking languages they expect you to learn.

“But _why?_ ” Nile asks, staring down the barrel of a list of languages so long she hasn’t even heard of some of them. “And don’t say ‘because I said so’.”

Andy suppresses a smile as she settles deeper into her seat on the couch beside her. Joe sits in the armchair across from them, totally absorbed in his sketchbook.

“Because they’re useful,” Andy replies.

“You’re telling me _Welsh_ is _useful_?” Nile asks incredulously.

“It is if you’re in Wales,” Andy shrugs, and Nile can’t help but wonder if she’s just fucking with her.

“You’re full of shit,” Nile accuses lightly, and Andy smiles for real this time. Nile glares at her a little, which only makes her laugh. “You’re an asshole.”

“Okay, okay, look,” Andy tries next, traces of a smile still on her lips as she leans forward with her elbows on her knees. “I’ll make you a shorter list, but you _are_ gonna need to learn a lot of these because if you get separated from the team somewhere you don’t know the language, you’re fucked.”

Nile sighs in resignation. “Point taken,” she says. “Let me guess, you want me to start with Russian?”

“Cute, but I was thinking Italian, actually,” Andy replies.

“Uh…” Nile says, glancing briefly over at Joe. “Pass.”

“What do you mean ‘pass’?” Andy asks, her brow creasing in confusion. “You already know French and Spanish—Italian would be a walk in the park for you.”

She’s right, of course. For someone with Nile’s language profile, picking up Italian would be a breeze.

The thing is, there is _no fucking way_ Nile is learning Italian.

“Yup,” she nods. “Still gonna pass though.”

Andy’s look of confusion only grows deeper, but before she can say anything, Joe and Nicky’s bedroom door creaks open. They both look up at the noise to see Nicky walk out of their room wearing a pair of soft-looking sweats and a t-shirt Nile is pretty sure is Joe’s.

Despite his singleminded focus on his sketchbook moments earlier, Joe’s eyes track Nicky instantly as he walks the short distance to the kitchen through the living room. The expression on his face somehow manages to be fond and hungry at the same time, the way it often is when he looks at Nicky.

“Nile—“ Andy starts, but Nile holds up a finger for her to wait a minute.

“Just wait,” she whispers, sure her point is about to prove itself.

Andy sighs, but indulges her.

There’s a clear view into the kitchen from the living room, so Nile can see Nicky grab a glass from the cabinet before he approaches the fridge. When he bends over to peek inside, Joe tosses his sketchbook on the coffee table and gets out of his seat.

Nicky is leaning back against the counter and sipping a glass of water by the time Joe is standing in front of him. Nicky smiles and sets the glass down, expecting the kiss Joe presses to his lips as he crowds him further against the chipped formica.

When the kiss ends, Joe brings his lips to Nicky’s ear, his fingers tugging pointedly on the hem of Nicky’s t-shirt. His voice is pitched low, his words only meant for Nicky, but not _so_ low that Nile can’t tell he’s speaking Italian.

Nicky flushes deeper shades of pink the longer Joe murmurs in his ear, his lips parting in obvious desire when Joe slips his hand beneath his shirt to press it flush against his lower belly. He says something back, also in Italian, and Joe winks at him before setting off for their bedroom, not sparing Nicky a backward glance. When he recovers his senses, Nicky follows hot on Joe’s heels, his glass of water abandoned on the counter.

“ _That_ ,” Nile says when their door slams shut behind them. “ _That_ is why I’m not learning Italian. Every word of Joe’s romantic dirty talk I already understand is a word I wish I didn’t and I am _not_ going out of my way to learn more.”

Andy shakes her head and laughs at her. “Alright, kid,” she says, her eyes sparkling with amusement. “Maybe we’ll start you with Russian after all.”

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on tumblr [@prouvaireafterdark!](https://prouvaireafterdark.tumblr.com/)


End file.
